Just for Laughs - Ukranian vs Australian

[Hooligan Harry]

I did not want to derail the "Life is too Short" thread, but after posting the link to the mail order bride site. Could not help but click through to one profile. First profile I am hit with, and it sums things up better than I ever could.

Here is the Ukranian. She is 19. I bolded the bits that had me chuckling. 

Character

I’m an optimistic person, I try to find something good, even if the situation is very bad. I just try to see in people only positive features of the character.I’m very romantic person; I like romantic situations, films and beau geste. Especially I like romantic films, but frankly speaking I’m shy in a way, so I always try to close my eyes when I’m watching some romantic situations or I just begin to chuckle. My friends saying that I’m very honest, I always try to say only the truth. And of course I don’t like when someone gossips, I think it’s not correctly to discuss a person behind his back. My grandmother has trained me to be orderly. So I keep my flat clean, but I’m not obsessed with order. I think everything should to be moderately.

Interests

Books and scientific programms. I want to be an educated person that my husband and my family won’t be ashamed of me.
Also I like to go to the theatre, to the cinema, and sometimes to spend my spare time in the café.
I’m going to learn dancing I adore the ballroom dances.

Her Type of Man

I’m looking for the romantic person, with a kind smile, and candid eyes. He should be interesting with his own outlook on life without vanity, hypocrisy and brutality. He should be caring and nice. I like stability, but if my husband suddenly wants to dart off in some place and will propose me to go somewhere I will support him.

(preferable age: from 30 to 45). (yes, this 19 year old wants a man over 30 as her minimum)

Now compare that to this 23 year old aussie slut. First profile that caught my eye after a random search for slim/athletic women under 25 with pics which I pulled up off a local Australian dating site. Look at the contrast here.

Firstly im 21 not 23 dunno how to fix it lol

Currently single, came out of a bad relationship 6 months ago and not rlly in2 random hooks ups or immature guys looking for sex only, I used to be a party animal going out 2 clubs every weekend but have recently settled down alot and am sick of clubs and pubs...so how else do u meet guys now if u dont go out much? lol last resort...the net :-).....I work full time and am starting up my own spray tanning business on the side :-)...straight to the point just to let u know b4 u consider msging me I live with my parents and have lost my licence for 10 months bcoz of drink driving which rlly sux coz I love driving especially in my car :-)... so if ur prepared 2 deal with that then by all means send me a msg but if not then dont bother...

I am a fairly bubbly person and I love to keep fit, so naturally I would prefer to meet a guy who is also into his fitness or at least understands :-)

[Aenigma]

Damn... you've made a convert out of me Harry.  Fuck American women.  I want a classy, intelligent girl like the top one.  I'm jealous.

[The Rational Male]

Alright Harry, stop already. I'm still a few years out from being able to meet women who were "trained by their grandmothers" as opposed to MTV, and who want to please their husband instead of having him chauffeur her ass around because she lost her license.

Seriously man, this shit is depressing. When you get to my age (late 30's) and start thinking how it might be nice to one day give your mom another grandbaby or two and you look around and all you see is a bunch of unabashed whores, tramps, and trollops, you start to get an itch to GTFO when you are reminded of how beautiful and grounded foreign women can be.

I don't care what anyone says....FUCK american chicks. They can suck my hairy balls. I'm resolved to pumping and dumping their worthless asses. Maybe one day when enough guys follow my lead (and those before me) these chicks will wake the fuck up and start acting like women.

[Aenigma]

I'm going to be very biased on this- I am 100% in favor of "foreign brides".  Back in the 70s my dad was sick of the "skank" culture and obnoxious women in the US- he ended up taking a trip to Poland, with my Grandma (to visit family in the old country) where he met my Mom.... and realized how different she was compared to all the crap American women back home.  Long story short- they've been married happily 36 years.

Btw Harry, once again brilliant post- and it has to be said:

Law 9

Win through your Actions, Never through Argument

Any momentary triumph you think gained through argument is really a Pyrrhic victory:  The resentment and ill will you stir up is stronger and lasts longer than any momentary change of opinion.  It is much more powerful to get others to agree with you through your actions, without saying a word.  Demonstrate, do not explicate.

[My Name is Nobody]

I'll believe it when I see one of you bag one of these hot foreign supermodels. What's the hold up? Bag one already, report how it is and stop jerking off to their profile pics all day. Do any of you guys flaming me on here even get laid?

[The Rational Male]

And let the record state that the Ukrainian chick is absolutely stunning. The Aussie chick looks like the typical American broad with ten layers of makeup and 15 layers of bitch shield.

You could take a few pictures of a foreign 8-9 and put her beside a western 8-9 WITHOUT any words and the difference would still be night and day.

[Hooligan Harry]

Just to put this into perspective fellas, that is a mail order bride agency. So they are going to create profiles that appeal to what men are looking for. Thats not to say that this is not genuine.This is not the agency alone I can assure you. Having lived out there for a while and having been in and out of Russia for business for a long time, I can tell you that the attitude you see here is quite genuine. Maybe not as much in Moscow and St Petersburg anymore, but in most other Russian cities and most definitely Ukraine What stands out for me is the language. Asking for a man who is "not brutal". Trained by a grandmother. Wants to be educated so that her family is not ashamed. Has an interest in science FFS.

As for the way the women look?

Yes, that is normal. People dont believe you until they see it for themselves, but what you see here are average women under 30 who just happened to take some decent model type shots in a studio.

http://www.anastasiadate.com/

[The Rational Male]

I'll believe it when I see one of you bag one of these hot foreign supermodels. What's the hold up? Bag one already, report how it is and stop jerking off to their profile pics all day. Do any of you guys flaming me on here even get laid?

If you must know, I get laid often enough to satisfy my urges. Now that I have my life back I plan to increase the frequency.

I'm a pretty patient guy but you are beginning to wear out your welcome with your inconsistent stories and the shaming tone of your posts. I tend to ignore your posts cause they seem like a bunch of jibberish to me. You are welcome to post if you have something constructive to add, but effeminate shaming tactics do not fall into that category.

[The Rational Male]

Ok- Str8up- BRILLIANT IDEA.  Delete that post right now- will be PMing you with ideas on this.  There is big money to be made in this. We're doing this. Burn the evidence. NOW.

What post? I don't see any post....

[My Name is Nobody]

If you must know, I get laid often enough to satisfy my urges. Now that I have my life back I plan to increase the frequency.

I'm a pretty patient guy but you are beginning to wear out your welcome with your inconsistent stories and the shaming tone of your posts. I tend to ignore your posts cause they seem like a bunch of jibberish to me. You are welcome to post if you have something constructive to add, but effeminate shaming tactics do not fall into that category.

It's a legitimate question. How many times was I flamed over on SS by guys who never get laid? It's obvious it was straight up hate. I'm trying to contribute to the site but it's all good I don't need to post.

[Hooligan Harry]

I'll believe it when I see one of you bag one of these hot foreign supermodels. What's the hold up? Bag one already, report how it is and stop jerking off to their profile pics all day. Do any of you guys flaming me on here even get laid?

I think she is holding out on sex to mess with my head. She comes over and we start drinking and all I remember in the morning is that we didn't have sex. When we do have sex, I wear her out. I basically tear it up for hours on end because that's how I handle business. The last few times she came over, we went to the bed and she held out on me.

I haven't gotten a BJ in awhile too. Every time we bang I make her suck it, but I haven't got a spontaneous BJ. Yesterday we went to some stores, and I was hitting on women in the stores. I split up with her in the store and I started hitting on a hot latin sales girl. The girl had her tits all up in my face, smiling. I could have gotten her #.

My girlfriend comes in and I can tell she is pissed off. She ended up yelling and screaming at me in the car LOL. So the next store we went to, I did it again. Hit on another hot girl in the store, and she went off again.

I told her I didn't even realize what I did, and squashed the situation. Then last night, she holds out on sex again after talking about pornos acting like she wanted it. She told me to rape her because she likes displays of power. I was just like "WTF?"

I refuse to rape her. This morning she made a joke about getting me to beg for sex. I told her I will NEVER beg for sex, and I will never rape her. I told her that if she doesn't want to fuck me or suck me off, I will go find someone else who does.

Then I told her that's why I was hitting on the girls in the stores. If she wants to play this game, I will get it from another source. Lol, and this is all after she slutted it up with me on the first date now she is acting like a good girl.

What do you think about my handling of this situation?

[My Name is Nobody]

Want a cookie? You like my field report AND my girl? Damn man I love me some Klingon!

She ain't holding out anymore. I let her know that is forbidden and she more than made up for it this weekend! Had her bent in more shapes than a pretzel.

[Hooligan Harry]

Did she keep those workmen boots on while you did it?

Hey Im just happy to hear you did not resort to raping this girl.

Oh, and that was not a field report. I was a fucking cry for help.

[My Name is Nobody]

Where's your girl? Let's see some pics. At least I am throwing some real life into this place. As for the boots she was on a hiking trip. Want her to wear high heels?

Yeah, I was ticked off she held out the booty that weekend. I resolved the situation. Withholding the booty is a typical bitch trick to drive you mad and see how you react. I think it was a shit test to see if I would beg for sex. I'm not denying she is a bitchy, feminist, American slut. I'm dealing with it.

[Hooligan Harry]

So you are learning to deal with a bitchy, feminist slut all so you can get to fuck what looks like an alien in work boots? And you expect high fives for this? You weak, pathetic little troll. Are you that hard up for a piece of ass?

Dude, I dont need to post pictures of the women I fuck to prove anything. The bottom line is that you are passing comment in an area where you have so little experience or understanding its better that you just keep your mouth shut. You dated an African girl you met on the internet? I lived half my life there. I have lived in Africa, Russia, Australia and the UK. I have had extended stays in Colombia and Brazil, and I have seen so much of the world at my age your internet dating experiences dont even register as something I can take seriously.

You are in no position to be offering advice, and you are in no position to get upset when someone calls you on your shit. Simply because you are absolutely no where in your life. If something that fucking hideous can have you in complete and utter disarray I simply cannot tale you seriously. Stop acting like a woman with a sore tit, and start LISTENING to what people here have to say. People who have a shitload more experience than you quite clearly do.

Not everyone is here looking for basic dating advice, I think a fair portion of the people on this forum are way past that already. Some were never even looking for it in the first place. I told you already, read the DJ Bible on the SoSuave forum. You need to start from the beginning, which is with yourself.

Come back and challenge me when your balls have dropped and you know that the earth is not flat you ignorant fucking idiot